I picked up my Bible this week for the first time in about 4 weeks. I knew better than to let it sit there collecting dust, but with everything going on, I just couldn't make myself pick it up. Until 2 days ago. It was like it was drawing me to it, calling my name, begging for some time together. It wasn't really the Bible doing the calling, it was My Lord. Wanting me to re-embrace Him once again. So this time, when I heard Him calling, I picked it up.
I opened it to where I had stopped reading last. Don't you know that God ALWAYS has a word for us when we spend time with Him? This day was no different. Mark 6: 30-31 is where the Lord took me to.
"The apostles gathered around Jesus and reported to Him all that they had done and taught. He said to them, "Come away by yourselves to a remote place and rest awhile." For many people were coming and going, and they didn't even have time to eat."
I sat there in stunned silence for a minute or two. I felt like the Lord had just exposed my nakedness with just a mere word. There I stood before Him humiliated at my behavior. Saddened by my lack of trust and love for Him. Ashamed to be called His daughter. I have been so busy coming and going, that I was not taking the time to eat and nourish my soul with God's word. I was busy telling Him about all the things that I had done for Him, why wasn't He doing anything for me? I totally had lost sight of my prize. I had stopped running the race. I cried, I prayed, and I asked for forgiveness.
My answer came from another book that I happen to be reading at the moment that I hadn't picked up in a while, Prayers for a Woman's Soul.
"Father, when my love grows thin, Yours is abundant-for me, in me, and through me. And because Your love is forbearing, I can likewise forbear. I can go on...patiently. You never said it would be easy, but You did say it would be possible. Thank You for Your precious promises. Thank You for Your powerful Word. Thank You for Your enabling Holy Spirit. Thank You for Your patient love. (Written by Nancy Kennedy)"
I am so grateful to the Lord, who even though we doubt Him at times, still loves us and accepts us back into the fold when we repent and ask Him to. Today, if you were like me and are struggling, spend some time with Him. Don't turn away just because things are not going the way you had hoped or planned. God always gives us a way of escape. It may not come in the form we want it to, but IT WILL COME. I know this from my own experiences.
Thanks for praying for me.