Saturday, January 2, 2010

Communication Breakdown

Have you ever been to that place with your loved ones where you are communicating but nothing is coming of it? I absolutely hate when that happens.

Since I have been reading Love and Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggrichs I have realized why a lot of that is. Honestly, I guess it is simply because I am female and full of emotions, that I just expect everyone to know what I want and what I am talking about (can I get a witness here)!

One of the worst things that I do when it comes to communicating is NOT communicating. I am serious. I hold everything in and don't say anything. Then one day, Stephen comes in, says one small thing that I don't like, and. . . KABOOM....the bomb has exploded. He has no idea why I have just went completely off the deep end on a subject that doesn't even have anything to do with what he said in the first place. Have you ever been there? 

I am learning each day that I need to open up more. When something is done that bothers me, I need to speak up then instead of waiting until I am ready to explode. In fact, I was able to practice this the other night and I must say that I was quite impressed with the results. There was no yelling from me or my husband, no arguing or fighting. I simply shared how I felt and he said "thank you for telling me now instead of blowing up on me later". Up to this point, I did not realize what a burden that has been on my man.

So for this new year, I am working on new ways to communicate with both my husband and my children so that I don't seem like an ogre or a tyrant. I want to be just like the woman in Proverbs 31 whose husband and children praised her. She had the attitude that I want to exemplify in my own life. What about you?

Family thought for the day:
Retraining myself is hard, but I know in the end, it is the BEST thing for my family.


Kela said...

That's it! ATTITUDE! We alone control that. How do I react or respond? Am I predictable (in a positive way)? Lord, I sure hope so.
God's Word is the number 1 source that should keep us accountable to our attitude. It also helps to have girlfriends (thank you Jennifer) to help put things in perspective and choose the BEST thing.

Confessions of a Stressed Out Mom said...

Wow were you dialed into my thoughts right now. I feel like I am going off the deep end in terms of communication with my husband and my kids, especially my son.

Thanks for allowing me to see that I am in good company and I alone can control how I handle things and what I say and when.

Traci Michele said...

This says it all! I can so relate! Working on this. Thanks for speaking truth, in love!


Nocona said...

Read that book and it is good. I really like your blog.